I DON’T WRITE, MY HEART DOES
(Inspired by a fellow Medium writer Theodore McDowell)
I always write what is in my heart, but I’m not the only one . Okay here’s the thing, I’m beginning to see something that I’ve never noticed before.
(Hey knock it off. No embarrassment in getting smart even if it took a long time to get here.)
I have noticed something about myself and I thought I’d talk about it here because maybe other people might read what I’m saying and have similar thoughts. If I’m the only one with these thoughts, I would hope nobody locks me up somewhere.
Isn’t this a strange and a super-flobgobscious life. We are mostly controlled by our hormones. You might think that you, being an intellectual, that you are steering your own ship, but hormones are the captain and you are the engine .
Oh , if you think not, than you are a purveyor of bovine scatology. I have proof of how insanely the hormones can affect our minds. I have had a hormonal roller coaster ride all of my life. From too much testosterone to presently when finally everything is steady. Except for one minor problem. I get hot flashes from Hell. I’ll be sitting there writing poetry and all of a sudden I’m pouring with sweat and wondering why in the hell the furnace is running. You girls don’t get to have all the fun. Sometimes guys get hot flashes to so — — — — ha ha.
I saw a photograph of a woman sitting on the floor with her pillow in the refrigerator and her head on the pillow sound asleep. Try and tell that woman that hormones are not running her life. I think I made my point, don’t you agree?
What a wonderful life I have. I am so bloody jacked up all the time on my feel good hormones like oxytocin….. I have just a few intimate friends that I love so much. If anything bad would it ever happened to my friends, I would be devastated and I would never ever recover. Because of a bad marriage I have an exaggerated empathetic response. I should thank my ex-wife for giving me that. Being in empath is uber handy when you’re trying to write poetry. Ever since the pandemic, I have tried to write poetry every day.. I bought a book on how to write poetry and they said no matter if it’s good or bad, write something every single day. I stick to that rule and it has paid off. Writing poetry is a bit like riding a bike. You fall down in the beginning and after a while your steering with just your body movements.
Sometimes I think, what will I write about today? Oh my God do I have writers block? And then I tell myself just write from your heart. What is your heart telling you today. My heart is telling me to go read something written by Theodore McDowell. Every time I read something he wrote I think, that was amazing. I just went on a wonderful trip in his poetry. I can identify with so many things that he has done but look at the way he’s saying it. I only hope to be that good. But I must not imitate. It’s okay to emulate because that’s not copying in any way. Maybe you admire his use of beautiful adjectives or the way the poem flows or how it rhymes.
Reading Theodore’s work, no matter what the subject matter, I always feel like I am lifted in some way. I always feel inspired to leave his writing and go open up a blank page somewhere and just start writing about things that are important to me as I try to emulate Theodore. I try to advance my use of the use of interesting and creative terms to illustrate what I am trying to say because that’s what Theodore does. He knows how to make a poem so spicy and interesting that you’re compelled to follow all the way through. I usually go in for a second and a third read which is called a close read. That is such a good thing to do because you get more and more each time you go through. Theodore absolutely writes from his heart. Almost always his works make me emotional and that’s what I love . The most gorgeous thing that I’ve learned from Theodore recently is that he has found love and vicariously that has made me so very happy. He also gave me this gorgeous song in one of his poems. I hope you enjoy it as much as I did and do — — — — — — — Eva Cassidy — Songbird
