CONCRETE DIVE WISELY
You can trust me. Just look at me and you can tell that I am very wise. Well, last Wednesday I didn’t feel very wise.. I’m going to put this in medical terms, so excuse me if I talk above your head. I fell down and I went boom. If what happened would have killed me, they would’ve etched on my tombstone,” he fell down and went boom”. I am very pleased to announce that I’m still alive. Feel free to laugh, you will not hurt my feelings if you laugh at my pain . (you cruel son of a motherless goat)
Wednesday evening, I was rinsing off a couple of dishes and I was sideways stepping to the refrigerator on my left.
Birkenstocks have very good traction if you’re standing in water, but it has very very good traction on clean dry floor so, if you step wrong, it can throw you. So, I was stepping to my left and my left shoe touched the floor too soon and grabbed the floor unexpectedly. My feet stopped and with no reaction time, the upper part of my body kept traveling sideways. Me and the floor became intimate . I laughed at the thought that while I was down on the floor like this, I could check the refrigerator coils for dust. The floor is concrete. Everything on my body hurt. 10–10–10–10 — ….. It all happened very quickly and somehow I almost stabbed myself to death with my left ring finger. I damage that finger pretty badly and also for several days it was very painful to breathe because my finger went between the ribs pretty deep. Bruce Lee would have been proud of me . I think I hyperextended both the first and the second knuckel on my finger because it turned purple between those two joints and became swollen. I didn’t feel any broken bones there so that was lucky.
What a crazy freak accident and it is now the third day and I almost can take a breath without pain. God help me if I cough though . I didn’t think I broke a rib or anything because when I pushed out , I couldn’t feel any breaks. I could’ve just fractured a rib which I wouldn’t be worried about, but it appeared I just strained severely the flesh in between the ribs.
That is known as intercostal tissue and it is loaded with nerves..My lower left rib cage hit the floor hard as well. Again I pushed and felt around and there was nothing I could detect that felt like a break. Also, I was not coughing up blood . Something like that would be probably an indication that the lungs had been perforated by a broken rib.
I have never had any actual medical training in school. Everything came to me by the seat-of-the-pants school of medical technology. I think I’m a pretty good doctor considering . I do know quite a few things. I cured my own colitis and that is not nothing.
As I said before, I fell on Wednesday and Thursday morning, my body decided to get shocky. Oh, I just thought of something. When I fell, I may have triggered a vagus nerve response and you’re always supposed to go to the hospital when that happens and I didn’t go. Oh well it’s too late now and I’m still alive. (Doctors make mistakes too sometimes so give me a break.) I was in a lot of pain and probably slightly euphoric because I think I was shocky. Wednesday night sleeping, it was hard to hold my water and it seemed like I had to go every hour which was pure agony to even walk. I think I was losing all of my electrolytes. Also, if there was an 11 or a 12 on the pain scale of 1–10, I would’ve touched that. I always have low BP and I was dehydrated. When I got out of bed on Thursday morning I was a bit woozy and still in agonizing pain just getting up and walking. I think I injured every muscle in my lower back. I only made it halfway to my usual chair until I started to feel like I was passing out and nauseous . Not wanting to suffer another fall I hurried to my chair as fast as I could. Apparently I peed all over the floor on my way although I have no memory of that. I must’ve been the walking dead and have already passed out while I was hurrying to my chair. I was very lucky I made it. Then I proceeded to get the dry heaves and become violently sick for the next hour. I was pouring sweat which doctors would describe as diaphoretic . My arms felt fine and the only pain in my chest was where I tried to stab myself with my finger .
Many of you would probably be thinking that I’m a fool to not go to the hospital at this point but my Dad did not raise a coward that was afraid of his own medical emergencies, No siree. I drank a little Gatorade and I started getting decidedly better. The nausea started clearing up and the more Gatorade I drank the better I felt. My back still hurt like hell but I wasn’t nauseated anymore. I checked my eyes and my smile and I was ok there.
Had I called an ambulance it would’ve cost Kaiser thousands for the ambulance alone. At the hospital they would’ve given me D5 W which is basically sugar water. They would’ve put drugs into my body by way of an IV push inserted in my arm. I was in such extreme pain I’m pretty sure they would’ve given me 5 mg of MS — bolus. MS is morphine sulfate and bolus means to shove it all in at once. I love to talk to Dr. talk as long as it’s accurate and I’m pretty sure this is accurate because this is the way they do things on the old TV show Emergency starting Randolph Mantooth and Robert Fuller. Of course it is TV medicine from 50 years ago but it still applies, right ? I hope no doctors are reading this. They might be offended that I might poo poo their skills in favor of the teachings of the Randolph Mantooth School Of Medicine. Notice to all doctors — — -no offense — — bless your heart.
I don’t need morphine sulfate.
My back hurt like the Dickens . It hurt too much to do anything else , so I got into bed and it mostly stopped hurting. If you hurt yourself, you should stay in bed and if you take morphine or any other painkiller you’re denying your body the ability to rest and repair Because you’re trying to get back to normal too quickly. Narcotic painkillers stop working after not too long and all they do at that point is to constipated you. If you ever feel that you must take narcotic painkillers, take 2 g of trifala with each meal for constipation . You can take more if needed. take capsules because it tastes terrible .
It’s Saturday now and 2 1/2 days since my earth shattering fall. I didn’t break any bones and I don’t think I had a vagus nerve response to my injuries. I never saw a doctor. and thus I never exposed myself to covid by leaving the house..also, I consider my doctor to be my advisor and I never just do as he says unless I agree. I usually don’t take things prescribed. Pain is inflammation so take turmeric.
Staying in bed — — You may not want to do this because so many of us fight symptoms by not staying in bed. Sure it’s boring, but if you can stay in bed and even sleep, your body is going to repair much faster than if you ignore your symptoms. I think you should drink plenty of fluids and I really think it should be electrolytes such as Propel or Gatorade. I don’t recommend Aleve or Tylonol because they are so hard on your liver. If you take these drugs, I think you should also eat milk thistle capsules which support the liver and can even regrow new liver tissue to replace damaged tissue. One thing about Aleve is that you will definitely sleep, so take advantage of that.. My information says that if you don’t take care of a lower back injury properly it will plague you for the rest of your life so please don’t force yourself back to normal to early, take 6 weeks.
When it hurts so bad you don’t know what to do, listen to your favorite beautiful music, lay down, talk to a friend about your pain just to destress and than take a nap. I wish you knew how much I wish you the best. It’s a shitty deal when we are in pain, but we appreciate feeling good all the more when we heal.
My frieng Sugi took a permanent solution, rip.
It will be better swear, please believe me. Remember, the best and most proper way to concrete dive is don’t do it at all.
