COCAINE LIFE — PART 6
Now I fear that I will lose some of you because you will not be able to stand the horror of what you are about to read. I respectfully request that readers who may shy away from this story, I will ask you to grow a set. (figuratively of course)
Cathylouise, Bradan Writes Stories, Colleen Millsteed — -This is my debut in a short story, 1001–2000 words.
Well, I am numb with fear but I know enough to try to not show it. I’ve seen guys break down and cry because they are so scared for themselves. That is not the way you want to make you debut into prison life if you’re smart. If you cry, you will be seen as a victim because you are weak.
I have no idea what is going to happen to me. I never even thought about getting caught because that idea was not an acceptable one. You can’t concentrate on things like that when you’re trying to build up your courage to commit a crime that could affect the rest of your life in a very bad way . Naturally you concentrate on a good outcome rather than scaring yourself to death by contemplating the next 20 years in prison because you got caught. Every time I got scared while I was planning, this I just kept thinking that only $800 worth of cocaine could make me $300,000 in Denver and I could pay off my gambling debts and get my little daughter Lexi returned to me. All of that fast life didn’t seem so important to me anymore. All I could think about was my precious daughter and how I have put her life in jeopardy through my own stupidity. When I realized what I had to do to get her back, I started to walk through the details of my plan. I didn’t feel like I had a choice. My greedy life of beautiful cars and luxurious homes and beautiful girls and gambling was such a false life. All of the things I was chasing, are worthless to me now.. I can’t help but sit here and cry like the dumb little bitch that I am, but I gotta keep it quiet because I don’t want my cellmate to know that I’m weak. My insides are screaming to get out of here and run far away and to distance myself from all of this, but I know that’s impossible now. I’ll be seeing the judge or the magistrate soon, whatever they call the guy here that decides my fate. A kilo of coke is a serious offense because it is the crime of trafficking narcotics and I don’t think I’m going to get a break because I have no leverage. I can’t turn in other people to reduce my sentence, because there are no other people. I’m totally guilty all by myself without help.
I wonder had I not been so greedy, maybe I could’ve gotten away with a smaller amount of coke, or if I were to be caught I could get a lighter sentence. But that wouldn’t be enough to get my daughter back.
A few days later I was transported to Challapalka Prison located almost 5000 feet above sea level for my “trial”. I knew I was guilty, so the trial was really just a formality.
As I’m being transported in the prison bus to Challapalka, I feel like I’m not even in my body anymore. I can hardly believe that not too long ago my life was NOT teetering on the edge of uncertainty and terror. Now my life feels like it’s over. Eventually my sentence came to me and as I surmised, I would be spending the next 20 years in the very prison where I was being held at 5000 feet above sea level in the middle of the most desolate country on the face of the planet. Words can’t describe the people that are incarcerated here such as the Chiclayo Monster.. When they told me what he had done to all those people he kidnapped including a three-year-old baby, they actually had to give me injections of some sort of psychosis substance, just so I could stop waking up screaming at the top of my lungs.
There are wretched diseases going on in this prison. I heard one guard laughing at the idea that inmates were creating their own death sentence by passing their diseases back-and-forth such as HIV and AIDS, gonorrhea, syphilis, tuberculosis and dysentery. These guards have a very dark sence of humor. Truth be told, so do I .
